I recently lost my best friend Joanne days before my birthday and just months before my wedding. She was so excited to be a part of everything in my life that not having her around, especially for my wedding, hurts every-single-day. She was not a loosely worded “best friend”. Jo was and still is one of my favourite people. I always think when I go somewhere, Jo would love this! (or hate it!) I feel the need to text her as we often did when something funny happened or for no reason. Even though I know she’s gone, I still look forward to her coming over as she had done at least three times a week for the past seven years.
Being from Romania, I always had a small family. We came to Canada when we were young, so I took my friends very seriously! Without close family around you tend to make your close friends your family. Joanne was just that. My sister, my support, my therapist, my voice of reason or my going out partner when I needed to let loose and dance the night away! I've never met a person who didn't like her.
If you have lost someone and are hurting, please seek some support. I now know the pain of losing someone special. With therapy, the most important lesson I learned is to cry about Joanne whenever I need to. I need to be mad, sad and happy about the situation. It is important to let all of those emotions out. No one else can tell you how you feel about the loss. If you try to hold in the pain and loss, I can say from experience that it will come out in different ways and most likely in destructive ways.
I love you Joanne! I know you're up there looking out for me like you always have. I still feel you - I forever will.